What are we supposed to do?  According the mainstream media and the government, us taxpayers (as in you and me) are in a heap of trouble.  I’ve been reading and watching this drivel for ages and I’ve had it up to here (holding my hand six inches over my head).  Everyday they reinforce the fact that they are puppets to the greedy bastards that really run this country.  Their cannibalistic instincts have us as the main entrée on their menu.  Let me explain...

    Over the past few years we’ve had the unfortunate luxury of low interest rates.  This has had three masked chilling effects on the economy.  First, construction of new houses has been at an all time high.  Second, mortgage rates have been at an all time low.  The stock market has done very well.  I know what you’re thinking, “Mr. Fly, you seem to have your good and bad bass-ackwards.”  Au contraire, foreclosure breath!

    Contractors have been building houses as fast as they can.  They borrow large sums of money at low rates to pay for them.  They use illegal aliens for cheap labor to increase their profits.  Thus, they sell more and bigger houses at higher prices, built by cheaper labor than ever before.  This select group of “wise men” greases the palms of the city and county governments to change zoning and push annexation into the hinterlands.  Our elected officials, in turn, sell this to their constituents as a way to increase the tax base so they don’t have to raise taxes.  Therefore they can pay for all the wonderful services they claim to provide us taxpayers.  In the mean time we get to subsidize the new housing construction by paying for water, sewer and roads along with more helpful and courteous government employees.  The stock market is firing on all cylinders most of the time and it’s where the smart money is.  Nobody wants their investments in low return bonds and savings accounts.

    When the houses are complete, the banks and mortgage companies are happy to loan us money at low interest rates, with minimal requirements to qualify.  As a matter of fact, since interest rates are so low, they suggest loaning you more money at the same monthly payment so you can buy a BIGGER house than you actually need.  That will include larger tax and utility bills as well as more upkeep but they aren’t paying for those so they don’t really bring that up.  Hey, and if you really want to maximize your money, get an adjustable rate mortgage.  Yeah baby!  The economy is booming, the greedy bastards are lighting cigars with hundred dollar bills and then they decide to raise the prime interest rate a quarter point.

    Then one day after the city has annexed heaven and hell, somebody realizes that they’ve built two houses for every human.  This is not good.  A quick analysis reveals that there are too many greedy bastards.  Contractors are overextended, bankers are overextended and the local government has its tail in a crack because they have to provide wonderful services to a virtually non-existent new tax base.  At this point a lull occurs.  Hmmmm.

    Meanwhile, back at the ranch style house, the new homeowner is in over his head due to the non-qualifying loan and his own stupidity.  The promise of something for nothing or rather a lot of house for a little money begins to disintegrate.  The economy is shaky due to the poor news about housing construction and the pending collapse of the lending institutes.  By the way, since the prime rate rose, mortgage rates went up, further cooling the housing market and those with adjustable rate loans got a little letter in the mail.

    The economy moves from shaky to fully shaken and the stock market takes a small dump.  “Nothing to be alarmed about!  It’s just an overdue correction!”  Seeing this, the media starts harping on lenders going under due to home foreclosures.  The government talks about bailing out the lending institutes that have gotten in trouble through poor lending practices.  At this point the economy is really slowing and the stock market starts reacting like a worm on a hot sidewalk.  Enter the second wave of greedy bastards.  “Americans aren’t saving enough for retirement!” they say as if mere mother hens watching out for their defenseless little chicks.  They are such nice guys they depict themselves hanging out with us when we retire, assuring us we can afford a new sailboat because of their divine guidance.  You’re so giddy that you don’t even notice his vague resemblance to the loan officer that got you into the adjustable rate mortgage.

    Thanks to deficit spending, we taxpayers start taking care of the greedy bastards that previously squeezed the last drop of blood out of the turnips that used to live in the foreclosed houses.  The greedy bastards now have to light their cigars with fifties instead of hundreds and are driving last year’s Lincoln Mark LT pickup trucks.  Then the news headlines say, “Economy grows more last month than in the previous eighteen!”  Of course if you were astute enough to check this fact, you would have to depend on government numbers that couldn’t actually be checked.  In fact, things are looking so good the fed drops the prime interest rate a quarter point.  Soon mortgage rates will follow suit.  The guy on TV will be yelling, “NO JOB?  BAD CREDIT?  NO CREDIT?  STUPID ENOUGH TO KEEP UP WITH THE JONES?  DON”T WORRY!  YOU CAN STILL QUALIFY FOR LOW, LOW CREDIT!”